The Sole purpose of this article is to give an idea to our friends and family that “We are not faking it”.
Fibromyalgia is a mysterious and hidden disease. On the outside, Person affected with fibromyalgia seems healthy which causes the other people to see us in good shape, While on the inside only fibromyalgia patients know that he/she is fighting with 100 of symptoms.
FIbromyalgia is a mystery for the medical community. Doctors try different medicines on patients but not all of these medicines works equally for all patients. Some might get relief but others might get a flare or even severe the situation. Research is ongoing to find a proper cure for this.
There is a common Proverb that “Don’t Judge a Book by it’s cover”. In the family of fibro patients, There is a common perception that the person is not making an effort to feel better. Like we are not eating well or not doing proper or enough workout to get better. They don,t know that a simple 2-5 minutes workout can cause a fibro flare or fatigue which can last for days.
One other misconception is that fibromyalgia is a psychological problem. A healthy person would think that how can a fibro patient have hundreds of symptoms while in medical tests/Reports, There is nothing. Because of this fact, Many people consider fibromyalgia as a psychological problem. Just to be clear, Fibromyalgia is NOT a psychological problem and there is enough evidence that it is a real condition.
Fibromyalgia can completely change a person’s life. You can,t do a job like you used to do it before. You will feel tired all the time and like there is no energy in your body, Due to this fact you need a lot of help and support from your family, friends, and co-workers. Because of fibro, many people need to change their habits or even their jobs.
Life with fibromyalgia is a combination of many ups and down. One day you wake up and might feel energetic. You go out for grocery shopping, take a hot bath, Get your house clean, etc. But on some other day, you wake up and your whole body is hurting, You can,t even get up from bed, A slight movement will hurt like hell. Sometimes even breathing hurts.
Fibromyalgia Patients spend their every day in misery. Even though if a fibro patient doesn’t mention that he/she is in constant agonizing pain. They always feel small changes in their environment. Like a small temperature drop/increase or even the slightest touch will feel like hell. This kind of disability is called sensory overload. The patient is extremely sensitive to light, noise, touch, and smells. A simple way to understand all this is to just put yourself into the place of fibro patient. People with fibromyalgia usually avoid physical contacts like Hugs, slapping, thumb on the shoulder or shaking hands because their whole body is in pain and these physical contacts cause more severe Pain. If a Fibro person is not shaking your hand or hugging you then it doesn’t mean that he/she doesn’t like you.
Let’s Talk about fatigue. Fibro fatigue is different from normal Fatigue. A normal person came home from the office tired, he will take a good night sleep and the next morning he will be fresh and energetic but a fibro person cannot get fresh from sleep, actually, we don’t get fresh at all. It’s like we are tired for the rest of our lives. Fibro patients not only exhausted physically but also exhausted mentally. They can’t think clearly (Fibro Fog).
One other common misperception is that fibro patients are anti-social. They don’t like meeting people. We only don’t go the parties or meeting because we have a limited amount of energy which is very much less than a normal person and spending this energy on an event like a party or social gathering might get us in bed for several days. It’s not that we don’t like going out but we just can’t afford going out on parties.
Another Important thing about fibro patient is that they have memory issues. They can’t remember about things irrespective of that whether they are important or not. They also have trouble concentrating at things. These all things happen because of fibro fog so when a fibro patient says that she cannot remember, then trust her. She is not doing it on purpose. A common solution for this issue would be to write things down.
Stress is the key to many diseases. If we could just get rid of Stress, Anxiety, and Depression then most of our illnesses will go away. This rule also applies to fibro patients. Stress may lead to worsening symptoms for us. Always try to provide a calm and quiet environment to fibro patients at home to avoid flares.
As Discussed Before, Fibro patient tends to isolate themselves but that does not mean that they want to end their social life or don’t wanna meet you. On the other hand, Try to maintain contact with her. Offer your help to her in daily tasks like in cooking, picking children from school. Show your affection to her when needed so that she can feel that she is not alone in this and everybody is with her in this difficult time.
Support and help from friends and family always make the life of fibro patient much easier. Although it is very little we can do about the disease but helping her in daily routine is very BIG for her. Don’t try to nudge away because this kind of attitude gives the impression that you don’t care. This will greatly affect your relationship with her, Physically and emotionally.
My Kind suggestion to fibro patients close circle is that instead of just believing that this disease is just made up. Try finding it on the internet. There is plenty of sites and articles on fibromyalgia which are clearly providing evidence that this disease is not a MADE UP disease. Try putting yourself in her position to better understand what she goes through daily. If you find something useful on the internet, Share it with her so she knows that you’re looking after her.
Communication is the key to solve any misunderstanding. Try talking with her to better understand her situation. Show your support to her in this difficult time. I encourage all the healthy persons to Support your others. My Husband is also providing me a lot of help in daily Routine. Without him I would be a Sloth, Sitting on a bed for the full day. I hope every person have got a good idead of what we go through daily. We need your support. STAY STRONG WARRIORS !!
3 thoughts on “What family Members of Those who have Fibromyalgia Need to Know”
Thankyou for this wonderful article. I am going to save it and send it to everyone I know! It’s so frustrating not knowing what to say to convince people that I am ill and not just lazy! Or too overweight! I am so grateful. Thankyou from the bottom of my heart.
Sadly it doesnt affect just women. I am a 26 yo male who was just diagnosed with this hell. My only complaint about this article would be to change the pronouns so as to include people like me. Aside from that, this is an important article for people to read.
Thank you. I can relate to most of what you’ve said..